If you’re my girlfriend you get to kill the spider. I don’t fucking care if it’s 2 in the am. If I come get you cause there is a spider you fucking slay that thing like its a dragon.
i remember when i was 14 this kid asked me out and i told him i wasnt allowed to date till i was 16 and he said “i’ll wait.”
two years later he wished me a happy birthday and asked me out
did you say yes
DID YOU SAY YES
"They [your animals] can’t wait to hear your new album, what can you tell them?"
He’s got a cast on his hand he probably can’t bowl for real
when i get a runny nose
This is honestly so relatable and I’m going to need everyone else to step it up a notch